Created as part of The Sisterhood Works Project, How My Sisterhood Helped Me is our new IG Live series, delving into the lives of inspirational women and how their female friends have helped them smash their goals – and vice versa.

Bestselling author, journalist and TV presenter, Candice Brathwaite, and writer and podcaster, Remi Sadé, have been best friends for years. In the first of our new IG Live Series, How My Sisterhood Helped Me, they sit down to talk about their friendship, careers and the importance of being 50 gallon women.

On How They First Met

Remi: The first time we met I was about 14/15. I went back to the company I’d done work experience at, and Candice was the receptionist. I didn’t know her but I was intimidated because I was really young, and she was the ‘gatekeeper’ to the office.

The second time we met, Candice was living across the street to me and we had a mutual friend. I was 17/18 and Candice was a runner. We weren’t friends at this point.

The third time we met, we were at an event for mums, and I said ‘hi’. At the time I was going through PND and I didn’t feel comfortable talking about my maternal mental health, because there was so much judgement… But we talked, got on the tube, and that was it!

On Building Their Careers Together

Candice: The best way to define our friendship is Oprah and Gayle. One is OK being front facing, one wants to be all the way in the back!

Remi: I really value privacy… I feel like it’s very important to have sisterhood, especially when you are the first to walk that road. There are certain things within my career that I’m the first to do, and certain things in your career that you’re the first to do. Thanks to you, I was not the first Black woman to walk into that industry, but it doesn’t mean it was easy. I was the first Black woman to be a single parent in that industry, so watching you do it with your very nuclear set up and still face certain things… and kick ass, it’s such an incredible thing to see. You represent so many of us when you do these things.

On The Value Of Sisterhood

Remi: A big part of our sisterhood is that we’ve never owed each other. We’ve always supported each other, done for each other, championed each other. But owing, and obligation, has never been a part of our relationship.

Candice: That also comes from a place of us needing and desiring things from each other... Even though we seem to be so very different, there are things we need from each other.

Remi: We’re comfortable enough with ourselves to know that… it’s a really fine line, where you know you have different strengths, and to know that and not feel threatened… there have been moments in our careers where we’ve been offered the same jobs at different prices and we’ve had to be like, show me the papers. There’s a level of trust.

We’ve always had each other’s backs and mentored each other… for the first two years, there wasn’t a contract that I signed without [Candice] telling me I should sign it. There wasn’t a penny I made or a job that I did without [Candice].

Candice: Because you’re worth more. With me fully telling you what I’m earning, you know what comparison to make, and what you’re worth in that moment.

Remi: Our friendship is one of the few definitions of sisterhood I’m proud to say I’m part of.

On Being 50 Gallon Women

Remi: Your new book, Sista Sister, is dedicated to our daughters. You say they are 50 gallon girls and they should never settle. Why was that important to you?

Candice: The most detrimental parts of my younger years were due to settling and not understanding that I was, and still am, a 50 gallon woman who can no longer entertain the mindsets or accusations of 1 litre people. I can’t let someone whose capacity for love or imagination is only 1 litre, dictate my 50 gallon life. It’s absolutely not going to happen.

I see so many sistas and sisters lose their way, because they dedicate their best years to tipping out their water so the 1 litre people around them don’t feel small or invalidated or unimportant. I can’t allow myself to go to the grave with these limitations.