Hands up if you relate: I don’t seem to be able to finish a television show. My mind wanders and I grow bored, quickly, trying to keep up with who did what to who...

I need questions repeated in meetings when my mind has wandered, which makes me feel self-conscious as I pride myself on my ability to brainstorm and think on my feet (I may have confidence dysmorphia). And then there is simply not remembering conversations… or fading out half-way through. Most recently, my husband and I were having a whisper fight in bed. A few tense minutes after my last retort (which I’m sure was excellent as I can be quite cutting) I still felt miffed, but could not for the life of my recall exactly why we were arguing. 

I’ve written about all sorts of ways the pandemic has impacted the way we think. There’s disaster brain, where we have been in crisis so long that we just don’t feel that much about the very bad things anymore. There’s the toll of the increased mental load women have carried in this time, and the price they’ve paid at home and with their careers. But becoming some sort of goldfish who can’t even watch critically-acclaimed television? Not great. 

The good news is that I know I’m not alone. If I was, surely there wouldn’t 1000s of self-help books exploring ways to boost concentration, productivity and focus. 

One of the things women do, apparently, that can contribute to a kind of brain overload is constantly multitasking. A quick straw poll with friends reveals that they all do several tasks at once, or they say, they’d never keep on top of the house, job, kids and (lol) self-care. Of course, there’s listening to a podcast while you mindlessly (insert domestic chore here) and then there’s cooking dinner while finishing up on a work call and sorting paperwork. Essentially what is happening, according to brain imaging studies, when we multitask is that we are actually just very quickly switching back and forth between two tasks in our brain. We’re not really doing it all at the same time. And it’s more exhausting, less efficient and makes us prone to errors. So pick a thing and stick with it. 

Mental fog has been a big topic in the pandemic, as our work-life boundaries blur and we have less to seperate the different parts of our lives. A kind of low-level blah pervades everything we do and we lose our flow. We stop flourishing and simply cope with our days. Perhaps not being able to focus or pay attention to things for very long is just this mental fog settling. You’ve likely heard this before, but experts say creating space for work and downtime, even if it’s just clearing the kitchen table of all work product before you sit down for a meal, can really help you switch gears and feel less… foggy. As can shutting down the digital noise. Something as simple as turning off your social media notifications can create a little more space for your mind and boost focus. 

Understanding how your attention span works, and simply observing when it starts to wander, is something meditation teachers talk about all the time. But this kind of thinking can also help if you're wanting to gently bring your mind back to a task. One way to practise this skill is to spend a few minutes everyday focusing on your breathing. When your mind roams, nudge it back to the breathing. In the same way, when you’re focused on a task you need to finish and feel yourself going off-track, coax yourself back. Stay a little longer, here. 

Finally, to play devil’s advocate for a moment: if we’ve learnt anything in the past year, it’s that sometimes we just need a break. Sometimes a task is taxing. Or unenjoyable. Or tedious. And perhaps quitting it halfway through creates space for something better. We’re so focused on productivity and efficiency that we forget stopping, and letting our mind wander or be blank, is also important. Maybe being a goldfish isn’t so bad after all.