6 Negotiation Tips To Help You Ace Your Appraisal Website sq

From regular responses to making “no surprises” your motto, Dr Therese Huston joins us to talk all things feedback.

Feedback can be challenging to receive, and equally – if not more so – challenging to give. The start of a new financial year can often be a time of reflection, as well as an opportunity to look forward and outline new goals – especially in line with appraisal season. On the release of her new book, Let’s Talk: Make Effective Feedback Your Superpower, for which she interviewed 60 people about their best and worst feedback experiences, we were joined by Dr Therese Huston, a cognitive scientist at Seattle University. As an acclaimed author, her books include How Women Decide, which was hailed by the New York Times as “required reading on Wall Street” and named a summer reading title by Oprah.com.

Headshot Therese-Huston

Feedback conversations can be hard, so much so that Therese told us how one US national survey found that 21% of managers simply avoid feedback conversations entirely when they’re difficult. “I think that number is sorely underestimated - it's probably higher than that, but that doesn’t have to be the case for you," she said. "I want you to approach feedback conversations that make you feel more comfortable going in, but also so the other person can hear the feedback and be receptive to it,” she added.  

Noting that people are often far more comfortable with receiving feedback than giving it, and that 37% of the mangers she’d surveyed admitted that they dreaded giving it, Therese shared her tips for handing out, and reflecting on, feedback in all it’s forms. She also told us why, when given correctly, it can be an absolute gamechanger.

1. There Are Three Kinds Of Feedback That Employees Need

We often define feedback into two categories: positive or negative. But in fact, Therese showed us that there are three key areas that all employees – from those just starting out to those at management level – need feedback within to grow, thrive and achieve. Those are appreciation, coaching and evaluation.

In order to keep employees motivated and on the right track, appreciation is the most important, and should be given immediately as required, and ideally, at least once a week. Similarly, coaching should be given as and when the opportunity arises, and straight away, at least once a month. She suggests that evaluation be given at least once every six months, and importantly, not just during yearly appraisals.

2. Side With The Person, Not The Problem

Another important feedback tool that Therese shared with us is that in the face of workplace difficulties, it is imperative that you align with the person – not the problem at hand. This applies regardless of whether it's a manager-employee relationship, or a discussion with an employee of the same, or more senior, level.

Therese’s top tips for doing so? Always try and see the problem from where the other person sits, rather than siding up against it. As a manager, show curiosity, and try and understand the situation from an alternate perspective. “The employee will feel supported, will be more receptive and less defensive when they know that you’re looking out for them, and you’re in problem-solving mode together,” Therese told us.

3. Make Your Motto “No Surprises”

Sometimes, surprises are unavoidable. But Therese told us that it's best to keep them to a minimum if you want feedback to be purposeful. In a study from Therese herself (Huston, 2021; Zenger & Folkman, 2015) she found that most demotivating experiences came from surprise feedback, and over 35% of those that had received it, felt demotivated for a month or more.

So how should you avoid surprising employees? “Telling them about wrong turns as and when they occur will help prevent them repeating them,” Therese told us. It will also prevent lost productivity, or the employee thinking that you don’t value their time or pay attention to their work.

Importantly, surprises erode trust, and therefore, the basis of your working relationship. They can bring up fears and anxieties for employees around worrying who else might think negatively of them, or doubting the authenticity or strength of your working relationship.

4. Don’t Sit On Feedback

It might sound obvious, but a good way to reduce surprise and increase control is to give feedback at the time. As a manager, try and consider the kind of advice that an employee might find beneficial before you give it, and consider questions that show you are invested in their growth, such as “what would you like me to look for?” or “what are you hoping for?”

5. Tie Your Feedback Into Their Goals

Following this, Therese told us how important it is to listen to your employees thoughts, and then tie your feedback into their goals. Looping back to goals that have been set can help to keep the dialogue open, and ensure your employee that you’re there to help.

“It may feel like a bit of a stretch, but you will be amazed by what this might mean in terms of the other person being curious about your feedback,” Therese told us. “Use phrases like ‘you said you were hoping to…’ or ‘I know one of your goals for this year was to…’ to help them know that you understand what they’re aiming to achieve."

6. Always Check For Understanding

Finally, Therese shared that one way to ensure that you’re always on the same page, is by checking that your report understands your feedback, and the actionable steps that follow. “This is especially important if you’re doing remote work, which a lot of people are at the moment,” Therese added.

At the end of the conversation, always check that the other person understood, which you can do so by using phrases like, “what are your top three takeaways?” or, “based on what we just discussed, what are your top three priorities for the next six months?” Using this method will ensure you leave your discussion with a clear shared understanding.